


We Never Will Part

by wendymarlowe



Category: Princess Bride (1987)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:41:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27981693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wendymarlowe/pseuds/wendymarlowe
Summary: “You can’t be a pirate if you can’t swim,” Wesley said, barely managing to keep from rolling his eyes. “Clearly this is something we need to fix.”
Relationships: Buttercup/Westley (Princess Bride), Fezzik/Inigo Montoya
Comments: 11
Kudos: 80
Collections: Yuletide 2020





	We Never Will Part

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thewalrus_said](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thewalrus_said/gifts).



“You can’t be a pirate if you can’t swim,” Wesley said, barely managing to keep from rolling his eyes. “Clearly this is something we need to fix.”

Inigo glanced over at Buttercup, riding her horse alongside Fezzik on the trail ahead of them and looking happier than she’d ever been while kidnapped. “You have other obligations,” he pointed out.

Buttercup wouldn’t mind, Wesley knew. She’d shown an astounding tolerance for adventure so far. “My darling?” he called loudly enough for her to hear over the sound of the horses’ hooves and the night wildlife rustling in the surrounding trees. “How would you feel about living on a pirate ship for a little while?”

She twisted around in the saddle and flashed him the glorious smile he’d fallen so hard for. “The royal family might not be happy with us right now,” she replied. The love in her eyes shone bright as full moon against the darkness. “I’ve heard the Dread Pirate Roberts might be fierce enough to make them think twice about giving chase.”

Wesley couldn’t help but grin soppily back. “Excellent.” He turned just in time to see Inigo’s forbearing expression. _Tough. My Buttercup deserves every happiness I can bestow._ He cleared his throat. “We can take a minimal crew and sail to a small port I know in the south of Guilder,” he explained. “Stay for a bit and I can show you the ropes. Then you’ll be Roberts and--is Fezzik coming?”

“Of course,” Inigo said. “We made a vow, years ago, soon after we both started working for Vizzini. We never will part--”

“--You stole my heart!” Fezzik bellowed, causing Wesley’s horse to shy. “Sorry; I couldn’t help listening. We will be together forever, Inigo and me. He is my best friend, and my only friend for a long time. I like him a lot. He’s always been nice to me.”

“I… see.” Wesley wondered for a moment whether there was more than mere friendship between the two men, then decided it didn’t matter. “I know you can sail a small boat,” he said instead. “Have you ever been on a large one?”

“I was a dockhand. In Greenland.” Fezzik didn’t sound like he wanted to elaborate, and Wesley didn’t pry. “I like boats,” he added, “but I’m too big for most of them.”

“Ah, not for the _Revenge._ She’s a beauty, I promise.” Hopefully Pierre had gotten the last of the repairs done while his captain was away--the sooner they could set sail, the better. Wesley started mentally sorting through his crew members, trying to think of who might be trusted on a three-day sail with a lady aboard. Pierre, for certain. Stephens was good, Cortwaller was… no, maybe not him. Buttercup deserved much better than even the captain’s quarters on the _Revenge_ could provide, of course, but surely she wouldn’t mind waiting a few weeks more before he took her to his newly-purchased estate in the Aegean Sea. One hundred and eighty square miles of island to be the mistress over, with nearly fifty residents. The estate house itself was in partial disrepair, but hopefully within a few years they could have both wings restored to their proper glory…

“Wesley?” Buttercup said, breaking into his daydreaming. “I see torches up ahead!”

“Ah, then we are nearly to the shore!” Wesley let out a shrill whistle, which was returned in kind a moment later. “Buttercup, my new friends, allow me to introduce you to my crew.”

***

In the end, the four of them stayed in Guilder for nearly a month. It was long enough for the _Revenge_ to be fully refitted and re-stocked, most of her crew to hire on with other ships, and for Buttercup to teach both Inigo and Fezzik to swim. She’d found a woman in the town willing to make her a proper bathing costume, a fitted black dress and underdrawers. She grew tanned and freckled in the sun, which only made Wesley love her more dearly. The large house they were borrowing from an acquaintance of “The Dread Pirate Roberts” backed up against an old quarry, now half full of water, which made for a perfect private swimming hole. He loved coming home after a day at the docks, sweaty and grubby, only to find his now-wife and his two new friends splashing around in the last rays of daylight. Diving in to join them felt like heaven.

Fezzik caught on quickly. Wesley suspected, but did not say out loud, that the man’s exceedingly large girth probably provided him with more floatation than the average. Inigo, all sinew and muscle and Spanish curses not suitable for a lady’s ears, took longer to feel comfortable in the deep water. One night, long after Buttercup had gone to bed, Wesley heard voices echoing up from the quarry outside.

“It’s better this way,” Inigo was saying. “Cold, but better.”

“You look good without clothes on.” That was Fezzik. “Hold your breath and lie back--just trust me. I won’t let you drown.”

“I know.” There was some quiet splashing, then a long sigh. “Mistress Buttercup would faint if she saw us like this.”

“No she wouldn’t,” Fezzik said matter-of-factly. “Because Wesley would kill us first and she’d never get close enough to see.”

“Mmmm, point.”

There was silence for a little while. Wesley wasn’t embarrassed at all to admit that by this point, he’d left his sleeping angel alone between the sheets and was hovering near the open window, blatantly eavesdropping. The summer air was cool but pleasant against his face, and the sky was clear and speckled with stars. _A beautiful night for romance._

Fezzik and Inigo must have thought so, too, because eventually Wesley noticed there _were_ faint noises coming from the direction of the water--noises which normally belonged in a bedroom. He quickly closed the window and slipped back in bed.

***

“You look the part.” Fezzik gave Inigo a hot once-over that would have spoken volumes even if Wesley hadn’t picked up on their “friendship” over the course of their stay together. “The mask and the bandana make you look more mysterious. You’re ‘the man in black’ now.”

Wesley had to agree. His old clothes fit Inigo perfectly, with only minor alterations necessary. With the moustache and the thick wavy hair, Inigo looked every inch the dashing pirate.

“I feel the part,” Inigo confessed.

Buttercup drew his masked face down and kissed him on the cheek. “Be brave, Captain Roberts,” she said softly. “And bring my Wesley home safe to me.”

“I will.” Inigo put a hand on her shoulder and looked her square in the eye. “I swear on the soul of my father, Domingo Montoya, I will return your husband to you alive. And you will be free to find the happiness you deserve for the rest of your days.”

Buttercup looked from him to Fezzik and back. “I wish the same to you.”

***

The _Revenge_ ’s new crew bought the swap without a qualm. Wesley had always assumed he’d be passing the mantle to his right-hand man Pierre, and would do so by serving as first mate much as the previous Roberts had done for him. He found himself tasked as the helmsman instead, though, as every crewmate took one look at Fezzik--and how Fezzik looked at Inigo--and deferred to him immediately. If the captain and his large first mate happened to share the captain’s quarters, well… the first mate wouldn’t have fit in the normal bunks anyway.

That first voyage saw three successful raids on Florinese ships, all belonging in some way to the royal family who had so greatly wronged Buttercup. Wesley found great satisfaction in leaving them adrift with only their foresail to guide them back to harbor, their holds substantially lighter in goods than they had been before. Two of the three surrendered to Inigo before a single shot was fired, and the third captain capitulated quickly at the point of Inigo’s sword. The crew treated him with extra awe and devotion after that masterful display of prowess. Fezzik merely disappeared belowdecks immediately after they made their getaway and neither him nor “Roberts” were seen for several hours. By the time they made it back to south Guilder, every crewman alive was eager to serve the Dread Pirate Roberts for life.

Wesley left his ship without looking back, however. The _Revenge_ was in good hands. And he had a beautiful wife to love--however she wished.

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Yuletide! I hope this was the kind of story you were looking for - I like to think that these two had varied and interesting adventures on the high seas, long after the events of "The Princess Bride" finished.


End file.
